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October 1, 2015

living intentionally

I mentioned in my last post that I have been trying to be more intentional in how I live my life in general and in my marriage specifically.  It is so easy to get up each day and do what we do with little thought or intention and before we know it we have strung together day after day of unintentional living.


This can be especially true in our relationships.  I have been married for over 30 years and can attest to this first hand.  I am not saying that our lives should be one exciting adventure after another, because let's face it the cleaning and the laundry won't do themselves, but I am trying to create small intentional moments everyday.

This might look different for everyone.  For us it could be as simple as seeking each other out for a cup of coffee together and a little bit of face to face talk time.  Or me opening up a folding chair in the garage while he does whatever men do in the garage.  Or making up a batch of his favorite chocolate chip cookies.  I find even tagging along while he runs his errands gives us talking time to and from the Home Depot.


For me, he might bring me a cup of coffee in bed or put a few pretty flowers in my garden to surprise me or even fix a door that's sticking.  Just little things...

A perfect example was last Sunday after church.  The grand kids were away with their mom and I had a couple of hours to myself so I decided to head to Target to stroll the aisles at my leisure without having to go through the Lego section.  I didn't have money to buy anything except maybe a bag of popcorn but just the time alone was enough.  As I was heading out the door my husband handed me a twenty and told me to buy something for myself.  Swoon...the little things.


Now before you start thinking that we have a marriage without strife or friction let me set you straight.  My man and I are as different as night and day and our thirty plus years together have been hard earned at times.  We are both fiercely independent and could easily live together without these moments for weeks on end.  But the bottom line is that I love him and he loves me and I don't want that to happen, so these little intentional moments are vital to us.

You may not be married or you may be married and spending those moments together may be natural for you, but I am sure there are other relationships you have that could benefit from intentional living.  How about a parent, or a child, or a sibling, or a real life in person friend?

Life is short and the ones we love are not guaranteed to be here for ever.  Let's make the most of time we have and live it on purpose.

xo, Patty

17 comments:

  1. So true! Any good relationship takes intentional effort. My husband and I have a standing coffee date every Saturday morning. A run to Home Depot, the grocery store, all give us time out of the house and together. I find that getting out of the house is so important, none of the chores to distract you :)

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  2. totally agree....Im very independent and do not need much but my hubby is very needy lol...so its always a compromise, and I always have to be aware when he is feeling neglected.......thanks for the reminder!

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  3. Patty- We do the same thing- intentional moments---otherwise they never happen in these busy lives we lead. GREAT post. Glad to be back around visiting and blogging again! xo Diana

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  4. Beautiful post, Patty - and a great reminder! We've been married for 31 years and are quite different, too. I agree that it's the little things such as you mentioned - and making an effort - that keeps things going. Marriage is a lot of work!

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  5. Thank you, Patty. This was a very good post and touched my heart. My hubby and I have no problem in this area . . .we love spending time together and doing for one another, but I needed to hear this for my sister. We are not close and our lives and interests are far from the same, but she is my sister. She only calls me when she needs something and through the years I have gotten so tire of it that I have started to distance myself. Well, I need to make a point of letting her know that I love her. It won't hurt me one bit to take her a basket of vegetables from the garden and a bouquet of zinnias and if all that I do is visit for half and hour, it would be a good start. Thanks you.
    Your blogging sister,
    Connie :)

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  6. I love this post. So true on doing little things. I've been married 36 years and agree with everything you said. You do have to make an effort, but it's so worth it!

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  7. Such a nice post, Patty.
    Thank you!

    We've been married 28+ yrs.
    Being married to my best friend and sweetheart has always been my greatest blessing, and I try each and every day to show my sweet husband just how precious he is to me.
    Through thick and thin, we stick together and our love grows deeper. You are right.... the little things matter :)

    ~K.

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  8. Great Post and yes we too have been married a long time and need to add a little spark here and there!

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  9. Great post and such a good reminder... my hubby of 13 years is so good about doing little things for me... even if just bringing me a loaf of gluten free cinnamon raisin bread that I LOVE! or he may light the candle on the mantle one night for my deceased son..... those mean so so much to me.. and I have to remember to do those little things for him.... thank you.... when I do, he is all smiles and SO appreciative. We've definitely had our ups and downs (alot of downs) in our marriage, but over time, we are learning to appreciate each other more and more...... and do some special gesture now and then. Intentional living.. that is such a true way to say it... and I would be well reminded to do more little things for my other loved ones! Marilyn

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  10. Great advice Patty! We are on our 26th year of marriage and for some reason our differences seem to be magnified lately. Marriage takes commitment and hard work. It's truly a choice to get up every day and love each other. Marriage has to be intentional and those moments have to be created. I think people give up too easily these days!

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  11. Great post! My husband and I do this! Every morning we have coffee together before we head out to our busy days. We do all those little things together as much as possible. Just last night he asked me if I wanted to ride along to the gas station to fill up his car. Heck yeah I do!! LOL

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  12. Wise words Patty! I agree whole heartedly!

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  13. Your last sentence is so true. Life is short. I tell my girls, fill your days and then you will have no regrets. :) Kit

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  14. I agree. You're last statement has hit home for me the past 2 years as my mother passed away, and a year and one month later my husband's mother passed. I try to cherish each day I get with my husband and girls.

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  15. I agree. You're last statement has hit home for me the past 2 years as my mother passed away, and a year and one month later my husband's mother passed. I try to cherish each day I get with my husband and girls.

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  16. I have been touring your blog....love it!! Especially love your artwork...I will be checking out your Etsy shop. This post seemed especially like you are in my head......lol....which may sound creepy. But I also have been trying to live intentionally and enjoying small moments of each and every day. And now you have convicted me to be nicer to my hubby...lol. Love your blog!! I'm really not creepy at all....;)

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